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“M”.. as in Murder. I want to murder this puppet to death

The above is courtesy of Peppermint Park, an obscure 80s-era freakshow for kids, now made (in)famous thanks to the internet.

When my sister and I were kids, we were subjected to this kind of shit daily, as our parents enrolled us in “after school care,” which promised fun and activities, but usually involved us all being herded into a room and stuck in front of a TV for 3 hours. Now I don’t recall if we watched this show exactly, but we were definitely subjected to similar forms of swill. My mom will swear we enjoyed King’s Creek After School & Day care, but all I remember is being bored out of my skull and surrounded by kids who smelled like sour milk and urine. Getting picked up at 6 was like parole, and I remember my parents being real chummy with the employees.. I couldn’t articulate it at the time but I desperately wanted to scream: DO YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING BORED I AM HERE??

But, I was mature enough to understand that my parents worked long hours, and Kings Creek After School was preferable to say, After School arts and crafts with the neighborhood rapist. So, I endured, but grew incredibly resentful of children’s programming. I still am.

Video fun Facts: Some of what this deranged puppet says is batshit insanity, and I’d love an explanation.

“How would a cow go moo without a slalom?”

“the one important letter in momentemum.”

Also, at one point Ernie laments that without the letter M, there would be no “mumps, measles, or monsters.” What kind of sick fuck are you, Ernie?


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One response to ““M”.. as in Murder. I want to murder this puppet to death

  1. Oh, sweet Jesus. Hey, can you do me a favor and send me your address, so I can forward you the bill from the therapist I’m gonna need after watching that clip? Thanks ever so much!

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